Fearless

It might ring a bell with you when I say I have a 'fear'. 

Well truth be known, I have lots of fears.... hairy spiders, dark woods on a night ride, stormy seas...... my cereal getting too soggy. 

Five years ago however, I was introduced to a whole new kind of fear, a fear that meant I was petrified of someone. I have been trying to tackle this, as no one deserves to live like that. So when my Dad said he had planned a Great Day Out in the Scottish Mountains, I knew it would help. It always does.

My Dad and his friend Stu, both 70 years old, told me the planned route was really easy. I have learnt during my lifetime not to believe them when they say things like this, but after some persuasion, I agreed. 

This is what we approached.......Tower Ridge.

Tower Ridge leads up to the summit of Ben Nevis. "Just a scramble" they said, "won't take long" they said. I have walked in the hills and mountains all my life and am steadily, but slowly working my way through the munro's. I have done a bit of climbing inside on a climbing wall and have been on a couple of climbs outside, but nothing like this. This was a new level for me.

We set off from the Scottish Mountaineering Hut and within 10 minutes I was roped up and climbing up a 'v diff' climb (they told me this was the easiest grade of climbs, but I have since found out it's not!). I could feel fear climbing all over me as I tried not to tremble whilst perching on a very exposed ledge waiting for Dad to climb up. I wondered what I had got myself into....

I had been increasingly excited and nervous in the days leading up to the climb and sitting on that ledge in the valley was such an awesome, inspiring and majestic setting. I realised I did not want to have a negative experience due to my fear and the desire just to get the climb over with! I wanted to enjoy it, embrace it and experience it and grow from it. Sitting there, I realised that this was a very clear analogy of my life. 

I calculated my options .....

• the first was to give into the fear and have a terrible time; the other,
• to take control

I decided to take control. I was sick of it having control of me. I therefore imagined the huge black rocky ridge as this person whom I fear. I figured if I was going to conquer this ridge, I was going to conquer the fear in my life while I am at it....
kill two birds with one stone.

If I was going to get that freaked out it had to end with a positive! 

Every step I took I imagined that I was climbing over my fear. 

Every time fear tried to fill up my insides 
I took a deep breath, centered myself 
and kept focusing on climbing the next pitch.

During the climb we made an accidental detour which involved.....

•  a few pitches of 'v diff' (which means climbing up the length of the rope.... a long way when you are going straight up) 
• and pitches of 'severe' to get back on track, with a sheer 300 foot drop below. That means it's only the next hardest grade climbing, but it was really hard in my eyes!

Nevertheless, the detour helped in so many ways. I had to have complete focus to be able to climb that steep and in that exposure, something that I had never done before. Every time Stu got to the top of the rope I'd shout....

"have you found the path?", 

"NO" the reply kept echoing down the rock.....

God I thought, I'll have to do this pitch and at least another one! 

Eventually we found it, yet, the detour added over 2 hours onto the trip. A downside of this was that I had to go to the toilet and could no longer climb without doing so! My dad looked one way and Stu the other while I used a small opportune ledge, but this was whilst the hundred or so people on top of the Ben looked on!

The ultimate moment of the climb was crossing 'The Gap'. This is a U shaped section of the ridge, which you have to down climb, stand on a tiny rock with drops either side, then climb back out. I down climbed OK, but then had to wait for Dad to climb up the other side to secure the rope. 

I was left for 4ish minutes (which doesn't sound long but imagine where I was....) clinging onto the rock with just my fingertips and a foot sized rock to stand on with sheer drops of hundreds of feet either side and the wind rushing past me through The Gap.

I decided I could either .....

• start to panic (which could have involved the Mountain Rescue), 
• or take control of it. I decided to take control, Stu would have never forgiven me if we had to get the Mountain Rescue!

 I took a really deep breath (actually several) 

acknowledged the fear, 

absorbed the energy it created 

and turned it around to give me strength. 

However I managed, it worked and I made it to the top of the ridge 

and to the top of the mountain. 

I didn't just conquer my fear of the ridge, I conquered 'THAT' fear.

 Well actually the fear still pops back, but when it does I put myself back on that tiny ledge with the wind rushing past my face, take control of it and let it go to be blown away in the wind.

 If I keep letting go, it will finally disappear (this is what I am telling myself!).

It was an amazing day, and a day that I hope will stay with me forever.

This is the same method I have just used in mountain biking to clear some crazy drops with Roots Mountain Biking...but more of that in the next post!

Secrets of the padded shorts

There is always an air of mystery when padded shorts are mentioned and men might be nervous about this one, but I'm fairly sure some of you wear them too.

When I first saw my new bike saddle I could not believe how thin it was. There wasn't much of it. After a few rides I kinda got used to it, but it was not comfortable.

I thought that this couldn't be right and I wondered if there were some saddle secrets I wasn't privy too. I asked my coach Roots Mountain Biking, but for once, he really wasn't much help. After a bit of research I found something called 'Padded Shorts', they are meant to help with the comfort factor regarding your rear. I researched more.

I went to ebay and found these for £4.99.....

They arrived from Hong Kong very quickly and  I have to admit I was quite excited.  

This time I thought, I'm going to have a comfy ride AND I'll look like wonder woman! 

Sadly I was quite mistaken..... 

These padded shorts felt more like a lumpy thong and gave me the worst wedgie.

It was the most uncomfortable ride I've ever had and I kept having to duck behind the trees to rearrange myself, thankful only for the fact that it was a night ride.

I realised I was only on the brink of the world of saddle secrets. I needed to start again. This is what I found.....

• Importantly  ... and it didn't say this in the instructions from Hong Kong, but you DO NOT wear pants underneath (did you know that?) you just wear the padded shorts! Ahh, I thought, that will help. 

• You must go all out and buy a quality pair of padded shorts, there is simply no middle ground. The shorts have different materials and placements depending on where you need them. 

• Cream is available..but I haven't got there yet and I'm wondering if the cream is just for road bikers....a whole other world of mysterious road bike secrets. 

• Chamois (apparently not just for car windows)...still not sure about that one either and am assuming it's the road bike department too. 

Realising my mistake, I found these fabulous shorts from Endura. They have elasticated legs to stop them riding up and the pads certainly don't give you a wedgie!  

They really help the comfort factor and I recommend them to both girls and boys who sit on saddles.

As for the cheap padded shorts from Hong Kong?

 They were clearly not fit for purpose.....

So I gave them to my crazy sister, who I knew would find a use for them.... 

You can find more of her very useful fashion tips over at

http://thefashionfruitcake.blogspot.co.uk/

International (potentially) Training

 

Amazing ride from Glencoe, up and down the Devils Staircase to Blackwater Reservoir and Kinlochleven and back. 20 miles, 3500ft of epic ascent and midges not too bad!

Key lesson learnt.....must learn how to successfully bunny hop over the drainage gaps!

Ramsgill Downhill Race Round One 8th June 2014

On the 8th June I thought I'd have a go at Ramsgill Cycopath downhill race, the first round in the series.

My partner Dan Rides for the Cycopath Team and they are all really supportive, especially the other girls who ride there. The race is very grassroots and is a perfect place to start racing. I had entered a couple of races there last year, but I certainly didn't feel experienced, other than I knew where the start gate was!

In an attempt to prepare for the race I had a half day session with Roots Mountain Biking at  the Ramsgill track. In that half day Dan taught me how to jump and how to clear the small drop (it really didn't feel that small).There is a middle and a massive one left to conquer, and one in the woods which apparently is the middle size, but it looks like the biggest one to me. Will have to work up to that on a very good day.....maybe next year.

The race weekend was upon me and I arrived late on the Saturday night to sleep in the van and spent the night listening to the heaviest rainfall. I have my two children on Saturdays so I can't get to the track to practice earlier. Usually the race is over a weekend, with the practice on the Saturday and race on the Sunday. The other riders sometimes get there on Friday night to walk the track so they get to know it and then practice riding it on Saturday. I have to hope I get enough practice in on Sunday morning before the race starts otherwise I have to wing it!

Due to the weather the track was in a terrible condition in the morning, really muddy and slippy...

On my first practice run I had completely forgotten how to ride corners and burms. Not a great start. Into the woods and the mud was so slick I had no grip at all and just kept drifting and falling off. Panicking slightly as to how I would be able to ride it, we carried on out of the woods to meet the other girls who had entered. There were 6 girls to start with. One unfortunately broke her wrist going over one of the kickers (hope it heals very soon) and two pulled out due to the conditions. After this I was seriously considering not entering, but Dan talked me round and reminded me that the time didn't matter, I just needed to get to the bottom and enjoy the experience. The other girls were also a huge support, so I decided just to go for it and go steady and slowly just to reach the finish line.

There are always two race runs, in the first I got a flat tyre near the finish so did not qualify and I got a DNF (Did Not Finish). The second run went really well and I managed to make it to the finish line! I then realised that race run was the only full run all the way down the track. I came third, but was less than a second behind second place, and 8 seconds behind the winner, so happy enough and pleased that I had given it a go.

Just entering was a huge learning experience, but the main lessons learnt: 

• I need to make sure I get at least one practice run in before I race
• Take more chocolate for courage
• Take big knobbly tyres, like Schwalbe's Dirty Dan's for grip in the mud...

 

Will I try it again next round? I think so.....